An Open Letter to USPS

Dear USPS,

You may or may not know that our wedding is coming up in approximately one month. You should know due to the increased amount of mail going to and from our house, but I understand you're pretty busy and may have overlooked this news.

I understand that we are living in a new house on a new street that even 911 doesn't know exists, but you've been delivering our mail since February. Granted, the first few weeks were a bit rough, but I didn't fret too much because this relationship was new for everyone. We had a few rough patches since then (like the time you lost Keegan's present) but overall, I'm satisfied with our relationship.

It has now been 5 month since we started seeing each other and I figured you got the routine down. We give you mail (such as our invitations) to deliver to our family and friends and you bring us their replies and gifts. Not too hard.

It has come to my attention, however, that you have been severely lacking on your job. After getting anxious/annoyed/mad/disappointed at our guests for not sending back their RSVPs on a timely manner, I decided to email a few of them to see what's up. Turns most of them responded a month ago. However, we haven't received any of their replies. We don't have any neighbors that steal our mail. We're the only house on the road (that anyone's living in,) so it's not like you're accidentally delivering our mail to someone else. I'm going to ask you point blank, WHERE THE HELL ARE MY RSVPs????!!!

How is it that you can deliver every single bill and piece of spam mail on time? Those RSVPs were already addressed and stamped for Pete's sake. All our guests had to do was mark if they were/weren't coming, throw them in the mail and you delivered them. How hard is that?!

You have pissed off an already stressed out bride. If my RSVPs are not delivered by July 1, I'm going to be coming down to your house and giving you a stern talking to. A piece of advice? Don't piss off brides. They can get vicious and you don't want to see that. You and Forever21 are on my naughty list.

No love,
Aislinn








(So as you can tell, USPS has lost a fair number of our RSVPs. I was wondering if our invitations had even been delivered since we've only gotten about 1/3 of the responses back, so I emailed a few friends to double check they received their invite. All of them had and most of them said that they had mailed back their RSVP a month ago. Now, I wouldn't be to worried or upset if this had happened to one or two people. Things get lost in the mail and I understand. However, I talked to at least 7 people who said they sent back their RSVP and we still haven't gotten them. Now I'm wondering how many more have been sent and not received from friends we haven't spoken to yet. I really don't want to hunt down the rest of our guest list to figure out if people are coming or not. Anyone have any suggestions? Is this something I can/should go down to the post office about? There are three different locations in our small town, so I'm not even sure which one handles our mail. I don't want to come off as a crazy bride, but I really don't feel like badgering our guests if they've already sent back their RSVP. Should I be worried about gifts our gusts have sent as well? Any ideas, suggestions or similar stories will be much appreciated.)